Daily Archives: August 3, 2012

Wife has left me. What are your thoughts on Return of gifts given during marriage !!

>Request to please guide , how to retrun items ,
>in order to have an documentary evidence.

Preamble :
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this is a self help blog

the nature of this place is that suckers like me who once got married and got hit by a false case share our thoughts and experience with others

who are these others who seek advise ? other unfortunates are people like you (reader here) who got hit by this thing called marriage in India  !!!

Till they got hit by marriage fraud in India or by civil and / or criminal cases (like IPC 498a) or other DV cases in this so called called marriage fraud they would have been in “…lived happily ever after mode …” !!!!!! …

so some caution is required while this dialogue / reading happens
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The senior sucker (that’s me) MAY assume some things …… the junior johnny (that’s you) may NOT know those assumptions and hence this preamble becomes important

Hence, Please *DO NOT* consider this as a legal advise…. This is by no means a legal advice …..

I am also assuming that all mediation, patchup, trying to go for a second honeymoon, driving the elderly parents away from home, throwing un married sister into hostel, hiring a cook, registering the house in wife’s name and all reasonable and HIGHLY unreasonable demands of women have been met (or never arose) and you are at a point of no return

WHAAT ????

IF you have some chance of resumption of marital ties, throw this mail to trash and try taking your wife to her favorite movie, restaurant, temple, bar or discotheque !!!!

ok ????

STILL want to proceed  reading ???        …. fine ….

Who’s stuff is it & Willingness to return
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in your case All items **seem to be** given by wife and co; Though that was NOT clarified by you, I am forced to assume that to continue this mail

Why ??? : I am NOT asking you to give away 1 penny of what you earlier …. but just return wife’s and wife and co’s stuff

In your earlier mail you mentioned that the wife and co are eager to take away their things …right ?

In your second mail you have also mentioned that you are willing to give items back …it is just that you are taking time … though I do NOT understand why you need time for throwing her things out …

Now having settled that ……

Get two credible witnesses from your side
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– Get two credible witnesses OTHER THAN your parents and yourself and your brother etc … as witness

– Logically who could be that ? ACTUALLY ANYONE !! other than you and your parents and brother / sister

– practically who could that be ? say get the next door neighbor or family friend of office college or college mate or a school mate or 2 such ADULTs

– i generally do NOT trust lawyers … I do NOT recommend lawyers ….. BUT if you so please use a lawyer of yours as one witness

decide on where to exchange
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– I understand wife and co want to come to your place to take things away …. so that should be settled

decide on proof
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– make a list

– write a small preamble …. all it RETURN OF MARRIAGE GIFTS, by Mr. ________ to Mr. ___________ (parents); date ________; place ___________

– list all items say that all items are returned in proper condition on such and such date at such and such place and get both parties to sign …. positively get the wife (IF she comes there) and her parent(s) to sign ; also get the signature of two witnesses

– don’t haggle for small things. IF she says 1 petty coat or 1 cheap sari is missing, just say ok and settle the rest ….

– IF she refuses to sign, INSIST 100% for signature and you and your witnesses being present

– IF you are all the more hyper get the whole thing recorded SECRETLY in a video and keep it with yourself

– file that paper in a file / save that video in enough back ups and wait

wait for what ??
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– we generally ask people like you to read the archives of this blog

– that should tell you what could befall you and how to protect yourself ….

regards

vinayak